Things That Can Destroy A Relationship

Wednesday, February 24, 2016

Copyright free photo | Edited by Esther Maris
It's past 10, I just finished my work task, which is to write 2 articles. Here I am staring at my laptop.. I have thought about this blog post for so long. I simply wanted to live up to my new blog's theme which is - Love and Life.
Honestly I don't know why I decided to talk about things that can ruin an intimate bond between two people. It's probably because there was a stage in my current relationship that caused us to almost break up..

Once again, these are all based on my personal experience and opinion. You may agree or disagree - after all, blogging is all about sharing thoughts rights?

Here are things that I believed to be potential relationship wreckers.
They can be acts, to qualities and such. I didn't have the luxury of time to categorize them so here they are!

SOCIAL MEDIA
People of the past never had that urge to collect "likes". Some couples nowadays are very showy with their relationship on any social media platform. Yes, nothing is wrong with sharing how happy you are or being "in a relationship". But if the intention is simply to impress people and feed your self-esteem, it's totally wrong. Using your boyfriend/girlfriend so much in social media just to boast them is like a modern version of "trophy girlfriend/boyfriend." 

"But Esther I'm proud that I am his and he is mine" 

Yes I get your point. But what if you will experience the rough road? What will you post? Others try to compensate their unhappy relationship by making them look "happy" online.
It's fine in letting the whole world know that you're in love, but never let the whole world judge your relationship by merely what they see online.

Next, too much of social media in a relationship tends to lose the real connection. Do you remember having dates where you're staring only at your partner and not on your cellphone screen?
Some dates nowadays are plainly fake, I would like to encourage genuine dates where you get to know more your partner and spend time with or without selfies.Turn that phone off, talk to your lover and hold his or her hand, not the phone.

LACK OF PRIVACY
I want to relate this factor with the first. Letting everyone know what's happening on your relationship is not a healthy habit. I am guilty of this. I used to post everything that happens between us - I am not super showy/PDA though, but when we fight I rant on Facebook because I want to well.. embarrass him.
A relationship's problem is normal and it should be fixed by the two involved people only  - the lovers. Those who will read your feed will just end up judging you as pathetic and attention seeking (they honestly don't care if you're upset).
You might think that consulting your friends is good, but you will never learn to make better decisions by yourself unless you start doing so. Always value the privacy of your relationship.

Another thing about privacy is - privacy between yourselves. You both need time to be alone and don't be too attached. Plus, in relation to social media - you don't need to know each other's passwords - be mature enough by trusting your partner and knowing what's right or wrong.
Everyone deserves their own personal and private space - whether single or not.
Copyright free photo
SEX (as the center)
This is huge factor. I am not saying that the whole thing itself is a relationship destroyer - But making sex the center of your relationship is. Your respect for each other will be little and well, you will
not grow both as a person. Sex is made to intimately express your genuine affections towards a person. It's not to use each other as "orgasm sources." You get me? A sex centered relationship is mostly focusing on the physical qualities - looks, fashion sense, etc.
In the long run, it's not sex that should keep you strong, it should be the love and understanding you have for each other.

CURSES, SWEARING and HURTFUL WORDS
Think before you speak. Because of frustration and uncontrollable anger, we tend to say things we regret - I never find it normal for a guy intentionally calling his girlfriend as "Bitch!" when he's mad. Or I never find it nice to hear a girl calling his boyfriend as "Stupid!" when she's annoyed.
Those are not acceptable. Curses when you fight will eventually grow into something worse - emotional abuse and even physical abuse on both sides. No matter how angry you are, never curse on your partner. Think about it - what if you're on his/her part, will you be happy?

PRIDE
Almost all are guilty of this. Do I have to say more?

NEGATIVE THOUGHTS
I'm in a long distance relationship and there are times that I can't help thinking that maybe he will find someone better than me - and the result? We fight. He gets pissed off because he felt that I don't trust him enough. Never let anxiety and pessimism ruin your happiness. Whether you're in a long distance relationship or not never doubt you're partner especially if you know they're serious. Stop thinking about things that you don't want to happen - you're just attracting the vibe and you're just
stressing yourself.
Negative thinking triggers fighting and petty arguments. And constant arguments leads to misunderstanding and in the long run, it will ruin your relationship.
Copyright free photo
Honestly, there are a lot of factors that can ruin a relationship. I just narrowed it down to these because they're the most common. I hope this post will help you keep your current relationship stronger. Do you have anything to contribute? Don't hesitate to share! Thanks for reading. :)

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